Beyond Rock Bottom

“I waited patiently for the Lord; And He reached down to me and heard my cry. He brought me up out of the pit of destruction, out of the mud; And He set my feet on a rock, making my feet firm.

When I was in the hospital, I remember thinking, “This is beyond rock bottom”. Rock bottom is when you lose your job and don’t know where to go next. Rock bottom is when your boyfriend breaks up with you and you need to remember what the world was like before him. Whatever “rock bottom” was, I was the mucky mess underneath because I didn’t feel like I was even standing on solid ground. My life was spiraling so far out of control, and I couldn’t see a way out of the despair.

I think we’re all familiar with the spiral—it’s pretty easy to find, and once you get going, almost impossible to find your way out. And yet somehow, I did. Brains are a tricky thing though. How quickly we forget.

I felt the spiral starting again. I was losing my way out. I was scared. “What if I end up back in the nuthouse?” I thought. Part of me dreading the idea and part of me greeting it like an old friend. It’s a strange feeling being afraid of yourself.

As I was contemplating going back to the hospital, I read this scripture. He brought me out of the mud and planted my feet on solid ground. Rock bottom. A welcome relief. Here was my proof that my life is not out of control, even if it is rock bottom. It's so incredible when God has the exact words to describe how you're feeling, and gives you the solution. Patience. As frustrating as that is.

When you start to feel like you're spiraling, the only thing you need to do is find rock bottom. We all have the power to pull ourselves out of the muck, plant our feet on solid ground, and start paving our way out.